Reaching Our Goals and Overcoming Our Hesitations & Fears

Hey Lookers

It’s that time of year again when we all start thinking about new goals for the New Year ahead. So I thought it was fitting to share the below story with you which is about a goal I toiled over for such a long time, (too long),  I spent more time thinking about doing it and wondering should I do it, convincing myself why I should not do it, to eventually doing it. What I am taking about is starting my Blog, ‘Elaine’s Roves ‘n Troves’.  The biggest regret and learning is that I should have started my blog as soon as I thought about it rather than dragging the process out for almost 3 years. So to anyone out there thinking about starting or doing something, just ‘DO IT’, bite the bullet is my advice.  The more you think and wonder about doing something you are wasting valuable time. So I hope this little post will provide that extra little nudge you need to help you take the leap.

I have decided to split this post into Two Parts, so today in Part One I will talk about my goal, where it all began, my inspiration, an insight into my hesitation, fears and worries in starting my blog, getting past the ‘what will they think of me’ and the turning point.  Part 2, coming on Saturday 30th December, will share more on my  blog, how I developed the name, the evolution of my blog, my goal of onwards and upwards and what’s next for my blog.

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My Goal

It was probably about 4 years ago when I had a vision and thought about setting a goal to start my own blog after following and watching so many other bloggers, but it was just over one year ago when I actually put the goal into action. I celebrated my first anniversary back in November of this year. Then after starting my blog I spent time focusing on the time I wasted and the time I lost, but this only brought about more anxiety and frustration. So now rather than focusing on something I cannot change, I have shifted my focus to developing and growing my blog and I celebrate the fact that I did start it. I also have learnt from this situation that if you have a vision or aspiration then ‘TAKE ACTION’ immediately. I understand that depending what you are planning to do, all things need planning  but what was holding me back was my own insecurities, worrying what others would think and being afraid to put myself out there. There were not ‘real’ reasons to stop me taking action.

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Where The Passion Began

I have always enjoyed writing from a young age and growing up I always loved to write stories and express myself on paper, I was also one of those people who kept a diary and a day never went by that I didn’t make an entry. I have an equal love for taking photos.  I am by no means an expert, but I love capturing moments, experiences and discoveries in a snapshot. My combined love for these two things brought me in the direction to want to create my own blog, in essence it started out as a diary of sharing things I love, discoveries, finds and experiences and over the year it has evolved and now has a particular focus on Interiors, Fashion and Travel with a few other things I love or do, thrown in. Broadcasting that very first post was definitely nerve wrecking, but once I hit ‘publish’ there was no going back and the ­journey commenced.

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My Inspiration

For quite a few years I myself have followed many other bloggers and influencers, including Fleur De Force,  Anouska, Love Lauren, Louise Cooney, Emma Hill, So Sue Me, Pipsy Pie and Lust Living  to name a few and over time the list of influencers who I follow is constantly growing and evolving. I love to follow different types of influencers from different parts of the globe, with different interests and outlooks, which constantly inspire and ‘influence’ me. There are also many wonderful influencers in Northern Ireland who I also love to follow and can’t forget to mention, Life of Leigh, Shivon Style, The Breton Bird, All That’s Pretty, French Grey Lifestyle, Oh So Soph and not forgetting those on my doorstep local bloggers Cliodhna Fullen and Little Penny Thoughts and my sister, My Yellow Jumper. There are so many more I follow, this is simply a snippet of the many amazing ones that inspired and influenced me over the last few years.

Getting Past the ‘What will they think of Me’

For those of you out there that also have a blog, you might (or might not) agree with me that starting a blog can be daunting, as you are very much putting yourself out there in the public domain, for everyone to see and everything you do and say is under a microscope. This is something I found quite scary to begin with.  I wanted to start a blog quite a few years back but I always worried about putting myself out there and I had a fear of being judged (I probably still do feel a bit like that from time to time.) This ‘worry’ was always my hesitation that keep putting me off going ahead with it.  Whilst blogging can purely be a hobby for many, and certainly was when I started out, I definitely felt very apprehensive about starting it.  It probably was my own insecurities that stopped me doing it for so long, as I often felt assumptions would be made about me. My initial worries and fears were around what others will think, will they judge me, will they question who I am to be a blogger and so forth. Despite knowing and being continually reminded we should not worry what others think of us, it can be hard not to, it’s like human nature that we worry about how we are perceived.

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Then after attending various sessions and listening to some more established bloggers they too had similar feelings, of being judged, commenting about experiences when people remarked about them ‘who does she think she is’. Another panelist, the amazing blogger and infulencer ‘Fleur De Forece’ commented ‘when I was asked why do I blog’, she responded ‘Why Not’. She went on to say ‘it is just like any other hobby or passion, like playing football, playing an instrument, singing or dancing, so why wouldn’t we do something that we truly love to do’…. This really resonated with me and was somewhat reassuring to know that I was not alien in feeling like this.

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The Turning Point

It was then very shortly after this I was having a conversation with my sister and we were discussing this exact topic, how we worry about what people will think/say about us. She went on to tell me a story that someone else had told her. Once I heard this story this was really was the turning point when I made my mind up to ‘take action’ and my blog went live, my only regret is that I didn’t start when I really wanted to, but we live and learn.

So I want to share that story with you in case you are feeling the same about something you have a burning passion and desire to do and you keep putting it off and hopefully it becomes the turning point for you also. The story goes….

A father and son are on their way to the market with a cart full of vegetables to sell. The father is pulling the cart and the son sits on top of the cart, holding tight to all of the vegetables in order to keep them from falling off, each job is as important as another. As they pass through the village some people standing by pass remark, unknowingly that the father and son can hear, they comment ‘my goodness that poor father, pulling that cart, wouldn’t you think the son at his young age would pull the cart and let the father hold the vegetables.’  On they go to the market, and after a poor day of trade, they start to make their journey back.  This time the father is taking the job of holding the vegetables in place and the son is pulling the cart.  As they pass through the village they pass by a different group of people, and also hear them remark, they comment ‘isn’t that awful, the poor young boy pulling a cart at his young age and the father sitting there just holding the vegetables.’

So the moral of the story, no matter what you do in life, someone will look at it with a different perspective and form an opinion about you, not necessarily the right one. Therefore if you have a passion or desire to do something, if it feels right for you, then my advice is to take the plunge and do it and don’t worry about what anyone has to say. And remember don’t be that person either who forms opinions or judges others.  (I recently did another post with explores this concept a bit more, you might want to have a read at it also here.)

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In part 2 I will be sharing more on how I come up with my blog name, the evolution of my blog, goal setting  for onwards and upwards and what’s next, coming on Saturday 30th  December.

what others think of you

Elaine xx

3 Comments

  1. December 27, 2017 / 10:53 pm

    Love this so much! I couldn’t agree more .. I look back and wish I had taken the leap sooner as my thoughts of what other people would think held me back for so long !! Your a brilliant writer and I love your photos too!! Keep it all up !’

    • December 28, 2017 / 11:22 am

      Laura-Ann thank you so much for your lovely feedback, it really means so much. It is crazy how we all feel the same about certain things.

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